Utilising my legs

Wishlist

2007-09-28T04:28:00.000+08:00

Personal note to what I wish to buy

1) Oakley shades, ~$320
to pose, and to protect my eyes from the uv (great excuse to overspend)

2) Mizuno cap, $15.90
to look good at night, and to keep core body temperate up on cold nights

3) Moleskine Daily planner/diary, $39 at borders
i'm sure there will be places selling cheaper than borders. i want to keep track of my life daily from next yr on. would be fun to read how i grew daily, what i encounter. this diary looks good so i'll prolly write something everyday. would serve also as a running log. writing online is never fun as i am constantly wary of judgment ppl might pass, so i only write cautiously.

4) Weapon and extra set of thick gi, ~$130
training purposes. hai ll have to buy. not priority.

You get punished for being slack

2007-09-21T11:41:00.000+08:00

Just recovered from my sickness, fully, and tried to run again in school today. Experience was ok but chiobu never turned up. I tried following the 13-week training program, which started off with running 1 min, rest 2 min x 12, and I sticked through with that for today's session. But was really slow. Only complete like 200m within all the 1 min that I ran. If super interpolated, would mean i'm doing my 2.4k at 12min or even longer. Sian..

I want to be faster, last long and get my resting heart rate to be sub-50. (hypothetical aims)

I also experience my first running antic today. I went to subway, covered with sweat, and order a wrap. The 'sandwich maker' was freaking meticulous about making my wrap, in mild fear that she might add something fattening that might ruin my earlier training. Seems really funny. To me at least.

Tiring feetssss

2007-09-07T11:19:00.000+08:00

Luckily I didn't commit to running on my first running log post. I got the chance to try out my new shoes only just now. The shoes were responsive, light but I don't find the support thorough. Overall, its a very good investment provided I can sustain this interest. Hopefully next year, with proper training, I can run/walk full marathon (maybe?) with the MPU gang.

I broke up my jog today into 9 separate rounds around the track. I varied my steps, trying to discover ways to reduce stress on my right knee. My right leg is working harder than my left currently. Don't really wish to overstrain my knee for running to a point I can't even walk when im damn old. My stamina suck too. I can't maintain even short distance, therefore I need to run more regularly and lose more weight to make my runs easier. (edit: my tights are suffering stinging pain and ache from the startup run. must work my muscles more to let them get used to the pain)

Anyw, running on Friday is rewarding because there was an eye-candy at the track. She was quite cute, but she seems older than me. She was training for her sprints and she looked really intimidating with her spikes. Had to act act a bit to prevent her from finding out that im one lazy fat ass who just started 'running'. Will be going to track next week to see whether she is a regular.

Running seems to be able to generate fun. Shall run more to find out.

Alienation

2007-09-06T01:13:00.000+08:00

Don't think anyone still reads my blog so I decided to convert this into a running log - that will record my progress in running. For skeptics who think that my temporary enthusiasm for running will run its course like this blog, you're probably right. Even I myself am not confident that I will keep up with my resolution. Will do running for as long as I can, because I am now 75kg, obese and apparent meaty. Need to do something for my health. I am never good at running long distance. This attempt to be good at something that I suck in will be a challenge to me.

I bought a new pair of shoes today. Own it to my sponsor, my mum. And my creditor, my sis. If startup works well, I'll get more accessories. Need to invest more time in photog too. What I need now is a smaller camera that I can carry to anywhere to sharpen my composition skill.

Will be updating soon. Soon..

2007-02-28T13:32:00.000+08:00

"i try to get into situation whereby even my mum could take good pictures if she were there"

2007-02-23T06:56:00.000+08:00

Ingredient for success: wisp of luck

As if it wasn't ironic enough, and as if by divine intervention I had to sleep at 10pm last night, had a bad dream about how I overlooked one page of the German semester test - which caused me to wake up abruptly at 6am - and channel surfed to National Geographic Channel.

I don't usually get stirred up from my sleep by bad dreams, and in fact I seldom dream. I had been watching only Deutsche Welle on cable but it just happened that they are showing english program at 6am so I flicked away to other channels. Then I saw this program - At Close Range with National Geographic. It caught my attention immediately, and captivated me for the rest of the hour. Talk about luck in taking good pictures.

The show featured National Geographic photographer Joel Sartore, and in the show he shared his experience at work. About how glamorous it looks to be a photographer for Nat Geo and about how dangerous it could be too. His works are continuously flashed across the screen. His photographs make my pictures look like snapshots. His passion for photography makes mine look like interest as hobby. The show was very inspirational to me. There is a millennial gap between real photographers and me. I want to cry. QQ

I could be taking snapshots forever. I wish someday that could change.

I uploaded snapshots from Chinatown and Sentosa onto Flickr. Browse them when you have time to spare.

2007-01-25T00:31:00.000+08:00

Neu

Got my new dry cabinet. Finally a new home for my camera! But needs to leave it on for 24 hours before humidity inside it stabilises at 45% RH. Happy!

Also uploaded things in Flickr. Go check them out - you can follow the link by the side. Some photos of the City hall (as promised), and of my house's surroundings.

2007-01-22T23:08:00.000+08:00

Tutorial week starto

I suppose to include english words into the Japanese language, i just need to add an 'o' to any word ending with 't'. Effect of too much winning eleven. Anyw, my jap studies tutorial started, and I formed a group with a pretty smoker, a lady that bought the same rip curl tee as me and a 'Mabel' whose name is spelled as 'maybelle' but pronouced as 'Mabel'. What an odd grouping to be with. And consolation is, Maybelle is taking German 2 too. Ah, got a new practice partner.

I took the plunge and ordered my dry cabinet today. It costs $238, my savings, my movies, my clothes, my youth, my hipness, my lens, my room space and my electricity. But at least I am finally providing a dry home for my hardworking camera. And the new home is digitally controlled, so high tech. The new home should at least impede fungus growth. It will be delivered by Wednesday, so i have to clear up a space for it.

Tomorrow is aikido day. And my first new media tutorial. I am required to bring something that represents me. I should bring my camera along. But its too heavy. So i gather my aikido belt should function jsut as well, since I have been giving equivalent attention to both photog and aikido. Will just have to introduce myself as some aikido noob.

Made a list of daily to dos (its by the side). Need to construct 3 sentences at least to get familiarised with sentence structure and word usage. Will be doing that in an exercise bk so you guys prob won't see the sentences here. Unless I managed to construct something mega and extremely complex, you guys will be spared from my german. Also hope i can do 10 minutes of simple aikido exercise everyday to make aikido effective. Body memory works best if the body is hard-wired consistently. And ya, 50 cents for printing notes from my sis' printer. As ex as the school's printer. But at least i don't have to stand in a queue.

2007-01-16T23:38:00.000+08:00

Mein zuerst deutsche Unterricht

Had my first german lesson for the semester. Realised that I am very poor in communicating verbally in Deutsch when we are required to play a game which entails asking questions in Deutsch. I guess i must be more proactive to make friends to practise conversation with, especially when theres a few nice-looking girls, and approaching males, in class. The lecturer wasn't exactly ideal, because she kept throwing the you-are-wrong-and-I-am-going-to-mark-you-down look. Otherwise, its quite a great start for this semester's german class.

Supposed to go to the Burning Crusade launch to take pictures. But made the right choice to make a detour to the city hall/ padang to take pictures of the former high court. Will post the pictures later on Flickr, and it will be announced. And I discovered 2 specks of dust on my CCD. Will need to send my camera to Nikon for cleaning and maintaineance maybe after CNY, after I buy my lens and a dry cabinet. Cleaning will cost around two hundred dollars?

Aikido lesson at night was memorable. I mercilessly dealt a damaging blow to Khengwee with a forceful first lock. HAHA had never felt so shiok before.

2007-01-14T18:04:00.000+08:00

Cancerous

I woke up from a rather bad dream. I dreamt that I was hospitalised for a minor flu, but I was diagnosed to be suffering from advance brain cancer as well. I only had around one month left to live. And I do not know how I should actually spend the remaining of my life. Cliche but was quite a loud wake-up call for me to cherish the persons beside me.

And I changed the format of my blog. It shall be an all-text blog again, with occasional posting of pictures. I will post all of my pictures taken at Flickr, and the link is available at the sidebar. I went to Fort Canning and National Musuem yesterday and I had uploaded the pictures.

I will add more web links later on, and will create a constructive list of something too. I will blog too in german to practise. Got B+ last sem so I hope I can better the grade this sem.

2006-12-15T14:14:00.000+08:00

Conforming, blindly

Sometime I wished I had done something different,
to chase dreams,
to follow my heart,
to start a small talk with you.

2006-11-30T10:40:00.000+08:00

Clear knowledge
*I wish you guys have comprehensive knowledge of your modules to deter PRC pwnage*

2006-11-19T05:45:00.000+08:00

2 to make up for hiatus

2006-09-28T11:13:00.000+08:00

Eyes of a kopitiam predator
*I don't take enough pictures to turn this into a photo blog*

2006-08-28T04:06:00.000+08:00

Today is Monday, a science day

I was invited to the hippest mafia party, aka ah zhen's 21 course dinner last Sat. I was greatly amused by how Jackson and Bryan adhered strictly to the theme and dressed up like gangsters, wearing the badass $2 Rayban immitations and smoking. Ya of course, there were also the big grey flower on xz's trenchcoat and Tzemay's fishnet stockings! And the guns and weapons! I was handed a hammer, and I wonder whether it sorta prophesy my political inclination, when I'm contemplating to major in Political Science these days.

I started driving lesson on Friday. I think driving is more difficult than Deutsch :
And hope you will appear at the science busstop today punctually at 4pm!

2006-08-21T08:19:00.000+08:00

I am so unnus

A lot had happened since the last update. I had matriculated to my new school. I had disrupted from my obligation. I had started school. I had gotten my sweet laptop. I had missed module bidding. I had crashed the school's inaugaration ceremony. I had gotten my camera on National Day. I had gone to shoot fireworks. I had started school. I had pretended to be serious about reading up hundreds of pages of essential readings before class. I had spent $70 on my Deutsch books. I had attended Political Science lecture. I had to go to school daily for 2 hours of lecture. I had learnt that Arts, perceived to have lotsa pretty girls, is overrated. I had started speaking a new language. I had started doodling during Economics lecture. I had gone to Treetop Walk yesterday, and momentarily overcome my insecurity about not having something solid to stand on. I had yet change the title of my blog, but I doubt I will. I had been questioned whether I am really from NUS, because I don't know how to use the college email system, CORS and the IVLE.

One lens to rule them all, presenting Gandalf, Frodo and Ghimli

2006-07-16T04:21:00.000+08:00

I can't sleep when my shoulders are supporting the yoke of daunting aspirations.

2006-07-10T06:04:00.000+08:00

I do not have enough photos taken

I avoid getting snapped alone or in group activities. I am not imprinted on photos. When I die, I might just vanish, without proof that I ever lived. Everyone would forget me over time.

I also want to remember everyone who is important to me. I wish to recall the story which I have, with them.

2006-06-29T01:26:00.000+08:00

Wedding is a blissful event

I was washed into my elder sister's wedding last Saturday, and my part of any preparation only started on Friday, when I woke up conscientiously at 3pm and began to pack my room. It was only at 6 my table was reasonably empty and dust-free, before I set off to Orchard for my speedy shopping. I employed 2 fashion consultants, zd and jx (they seem to be the last second and third person in this world who knows fashion sense, with me taking up the last spot) for my shopping trip. Lets just say that I spent quite a long, but fortunately for the GSS, I managed to save quite a bit. So at the end of the trip, I got lotsa bitchings from the impatient Mr zd, a decently-looking pair of shoes thanks to jx, and 2 shirts which I did not regret buying albeit their costs.

On the actual day, I was shaken awake by all the din and excitement that saturated my house. My mom's friends were ironing our clothes, preparing red bean paste and hanging up the red scarf(?) at the door. KT's (my elder sis) friends were busy dressing her up and tidying her hair. There were people filming the event, the photographer was waiting for any actual event to happen and everyone was like a frenzied ant, playing their roles to ensure that nothing goes wrong, at least not before the bridegroom and the bride left our house for the next item on the itinerary.

I was the official car door opener. And I was asked to rip more angbao money off my brother-in-law by not opening the door for him. But it started drizzling so I decided not to be an asshole who would spoil the wedding by making everyone drenched and I opened the car door readily for him. There came the 'Give us $9999 then we open the door for you' ceremony. I was made to stay outside my own house with the male bridegroom crew, trying to bargain our way into the house. We were made to eat wasabe bread - I helped to eat - and the engineering-based bridegroom was requireed to compose a poem. The lack of poetic cells in engineer joke didn't manage to absent itself and Joe (bridegroom) took like more than 15 minutes to compose something decent. Then we were made to go to the third storey, where one of my KT's helpers stays, where Joe had to announce to her mother that he would be getting married to KT. With all his efforts, we managed to gain entry into the house at a low price of $188 I think.

Nothing significant happened afterwards, before the church wedding at 2, except that I won a watch at ebay. The church ceremony was normal, and I admit that I did fall asleep during the sermons. I witnessed the vow exchange, the kissing and the declaration and sealing of the marriage. Couldn't help but feel a tinge of sweetness. Then the secret blog, which Joe was keeping for ard a year and a half, was revealed - a blog which conscientiously recorded all the moments the couple shared during the courtship. Awwww, okay girls wake up, not every guy is so sweet. The 'branded' buffet that followed the ceremony was really good, with designer plates, people on standby to clear your used utensils and delicious food.

I took a nap before the wedding dinner. I was so tired during the wedding, even though I was not doing a lot of running about, that I really sympathised with the couple. I doubt I'll ever have the stamina to last till the end of my (ever) wedding. Then so bloody cool, first time offered the VIP seat during the wedding!! The table setting was different, we got to use special utencils and all the food was distributed by the banquet staff. I only had to eat, and I did not have to like reach and snatch for the best portion of the dishes food perpetually like in other wedding dinners. The wedding did not only bind the couple. It also brought friends and relatives from 2 families that were not affiliated in anyway except through the couple together. It had brought friends and relatives of my family whom we had lost contact with together. All with a common objective to bless the couple with eternal happiness and other corny stuff.

The wedding concluded with lots of mirth, joy, photographes taken, blessing exchanged and of course, a new room for myself.

2006-06-22T09:53:00.000+08:00

Hiatus

I saw my type today. She looks cold.

And I thank whoever still visits this stagnant blog.

I was supposed to go under the knife yesterday.
To remove my fixation. And to remove the metal detector joke.

2006-06-02T23:48:00.000+08:00

It ain't gonna work with an early plan

This week, the blueprint for my future is altered drastically.
Thoughts and emotions are tumbling violently inside me.

This week, I did some conscientious research on how I would be credited academically, and I realised my wish to pick up 2 languages in school might jeopardise my good class honors plan. Therefore, I am forced to re-tailor my language learning plan to firstly, pick up Nihongo from a 5-yr course from jiaxiang's current school and secondly, learn Deutsch instead of français.

I am not good with melodrama.

2006-05-22T22:07:00.000+08:00

Opportunity cost > policeman

I always like to re-read my post, particularly my last one. Therefore I am relunctant to write something new to displace it. Eventually I have to, and I chose now because I have a lot of free time at hand. I have spent quite some time watching Hikaru no Go!. I have had my dinner. I have scheduled 10 episodes of the anime for encoding. I have admired at the beauty of MacBook for the umpteenth time. Its all done before 10.30pm. I, rather than a video game, own my soul now. I've escaped from the clutches of wow. I'm losing the addiction.

I am glad.

2006-05-07T23:12:00.000+08:00

Sleepiness is my alcohol, my anesthetic

When I have ample sleep, I will be clear-headed. That is when problems arise.

I will then give serious considerations and evaluations of my current situation.

Several issues of grave gravity had concluded with not the best desired outcomes.

Situation one: Bottle-necked for aikido, badminton and wow.

Inherent fear embedded deep inside me, for whatever reasons, be it I'm scared that I will hurt my uke if I become too forceful or being afraid that moving too swiftly will cause me to miss steps in techniques, has resulted in unnecessary hesitations in my aikido moves, ironically making them overall less aiki. I can't progress beyond my current level unless I overcome all my fears. Aikido or non-aikido.

As for badminton, can't get the proper stroke and footwork. Maybe will need to play more with clement and benedict. But I nv make any proper effort to initiate games with them.

Wow, sad. Have been playing for half a year. I want to explore the high-end pve content but am held back by friends who think 40-man raids are stupid. Maybe I'll get keyed for those big instances by the time I start clearing leave and I'll join a big guild to raid. Before that happens, I'll most probably be roaming ard aimlessly inside game. I have already wasted 34 days (translated to 816 hours) in a video game, so what is another 50-70 hrs to me?

Situation two: I need a pragmatic major to feed myself later. But I don't like economics.

I need to admit. FASS (shake head) is too cool for me. I don't really know what I can become next time with either a Bachelor of Arts or B.A. (Soc sci). Economics looks most pragmatic. But the only reason I'll take up Economics will be for the Double Honors program. The one whereby you'll grad with Law honors and Arts honors. Its too ambitious to even dream about the program as only 8 year ones who majored in econs, I think, will get the chance to enter the program. That means to even enter, I must be amongst the top of the economics students. I have to mug 24/7.

I have 3 months of jc economics background. People who had studied econs 2 years complained about how tough it is. I'm tempted to try. Will need to review the feasibility of this plan 2 weeks later.

Situation san: I definitely have more than 2 problems, but I cannot pinpoint them now.

2006-04-30T07:18:00.000+08:00

Carpal Tunnel Syndrome

I'm suspecting that I have carpal tunnel syndrome. Actually felt this sharp pain while playing badminton yesterday morning. And my wrist hurts while holding a mouse just now. Maybe I shld stop my computer usage these few days.

Anyway, just had immerse fun in game. I was actually chased and killed by 2 rogues from Drama (one of the biggest guild on the Alliance side), sheerly because I killed one of them and he must have felt damn bad about the loss of his 'invulnerability'. Guess he must have thought that he's tier 2 epic out and he didn't expect to be killed by anyone. I bet they must be camping my corpse now, and for the next 2 hours. So guys, be glad that those 2 rogues brought you this current update.

Don't think anyone will be interested in what am I playing as and what is tier 2 epic out so I shall not dwell on the gameplay of wow.

Ya, took IPPT last wednesday. If you expect any mention of my physical inadequencies, then you're wrong. Just want to mention about how I'll be like in another 5 years time. Given the rate I'm gaining weight, the number of hours that I will be sitting in school listening to lectures and tutorials and the severeness of my physical inactivity, I will definitely be developing a bigger tummy and have frequent heart arrests from walking up the stairs from storey 1 to storey 1.6. I saw myself in those elder officers (in their late thirties). They can't do pull-ups, have to perform static cycling instead of running 2.4, can't even complete their shuttlerun in time and so on. I don't to be like them. But I'm lazy to do anything about it. And I will become like them. Ahhhhhhhhhhhh, how?

2006-04-21T09:21:00.000+08:00

The importance of opportunity

I saw an empty merc cab today and hestitated. It went off. Then I decided to settle for a normal one. Hundreds other people popped out to compete for cab. Flagged one down only 15 minutes later.

2006-04-16T05:46:00.000+08:00

knn

I lost a post which I spent effort to craft.

2006-04-10T01:37:00.000+08:00

Sometimes, giver of false hope

receives false hope in return.

(p.s I am aiming to write something long, but am not really motivated to do so yet. Something about inexperience. Just wait till this week is over.)

2006-04-03T13:35:00.000+08:00

April's Fool

Well, (as of 3 Apr 06) less 14 days leave, weekends and public holidays, I still have 72 working days to my psuedo ORD.

Assumptions made:
1) I am granted disruption on 26 Jul 06
2) I'm still physically viable for National Service
3) I'm still a male by then

2006-03-31T14:52:00.000+08:00

Pictures are hard to come by

2006-03-20T11:47:00.000+08:00

A series of sad events happened

Well, my aikido dojo might be closed down due to poor attendance rate, and also because my instructor is not able to conduct class at 6 due to his new job requirements. He should be starting a new dojo at HTA - which is favorable to me due to its location - and I might join that dojo when school starts. There is this bitter feeling to its potential closing down, cause afterall PHQ dojo is where I picked up something which I like - though not as intensely as before - and separation from friends whom I have made is inevitable and imminent.

I still can remember vividly, the first time I went to the dojo in my tee-shirt and track pants and without knowing any one from the dojo except for a remotely-connected friend of Vincent. Seeing that everyone training was donned in gi, given my character and the fact that I'll be a misfit, I would definitely have shied away from the class then. I wouldn't have the courage to walk into the class to join them. But fortunately, I manage to muster sufficient courage to. I was then ushered warmly into the fascinating world of aikido, by Bernie (instructor) and the rest (I don't wish to name all), into a world whereby I realised my inability to coordinate my limps well, whereby I am too secular, whereby I feel most alive (ya, hypobole) and whereby I find fun.

I need something to rekindle my passion for aikido.

And I hate narrations. I will not continue with the long chain of other sad events. I feel worst for the breaking-up of my guild. And this post nearly ended up as a draft which I most probably would be too lazy to continue as narrating is very taxing, for me.

2006-03-17T02:36:00.000+08:00

With 1.8k

I can either

1) buy a Nikon D70s kit, to persue my photography interest;
2) use the money as top-up, to get a MacBook Pro (hope my parents will fork up the rest);
3) or save, so I will have sufficient fundings to play ard with while schooling.

I wish I can choose all 3.

2006-03-12T01:35:00.000+08:00

Just finished watching 'The Pianist' and I am jealous of how professionals can run their long and slender fingers effortlessly along the ebony and ivory keys to produce beautiful music.

They should all burn in hell.

2006-03-11T05:43:00.000+08:00

I'm in the middle of a battleground

Well, my general observation indicates that we, including pessimists, reject negative sooth and embrace positivities. That is to say, people hate me for being SO direct at times, when I was merely reflecting grim realities to them.

My department's Dinner & Dance just now. Was pretty much screwed up even before reaching the venue - Jewel Box at Faber Hill (familiar naming: Mt. Faber) Firstly it was lm saying something noobish (naive too), something about the sad realities of WoW's end-game content, and I really wanted to slap him for that. proofs of my accurate observation. Then fucktard Richard was supposed to flag a cab at 6.40. At 6.35, he's still asking about the attire for the occasion. And he took freaking 40 minutes to get an unoccupied cab, when I had already saw hundreds zooming past me. Second slap goes to him. Then the third one would indisputably go to the cab driver. Wtf, he drove until can stall one! He's the winner. The third tight slap nearly went to him.

Food was edible, not fantasic. SPF performance band was invited to perform, but as usual, as rude Singaporeans, nobody were really paying attention. Most saddeningly was I didn't get to win PSP from the lucky draw. Overall, experience was merely satisfying because got door gift.

Then first time travel in Singapore's cable car, ha! So scary, as I took from Habourfront to Faber Hill. Below all roads and expressway, if really plunge to the ground, consperm die. Then Leo also hum, so nice to find company.

It was a tiring day. Sleep once I reached home.

2006-03-08T14:27:00.000+08:00

As you might notice, I am writing more.

The new walls fixed yesterday has made my cubicle more cosy, and more conspiciously caging. But I do get new spaces - from the overhead cupboard - to hide my Nutella, my flowery cup, my utensils and some confidential documents, which are very nice trade-offs for increased segregation from the rest of the divisions in my department.

Yesterday met up for dinner with my primary school friends, namely cy, wank, cindy and Cailing. They gave me 'something' for my birthday unexpectedly (I'm not hawking for more gifts :))) ), so I am actually touched, while feeling guilty for not treating them as nice as they deserved to be.

Ya, these few days will be hectic for me, as I'm soloing in office, tackling saigang alone.

2006-03-07T15:08:00.000+08:00

I will have more sleep in the future, as I have set parental control in such a way that I will automatically be disconnected from wow server at 1am sharp.

Instead of asking what job grade a person is holding, I actually asked, 'ta level ji le'. And I see level as something numerical, from 1 - 60.

I am more walled up in my cubicle, as they just raised the height of the cubicle wall.

2006-02-16T14:21:00.000+08:00

Screw it

I am pretty much on track to failing my advance theory test. Test is on Saturaday morning, and now being Thursday and I WILL play away all my free time at night, and tomorrow being Qj's party, I am going to flunked my ATT. Badly.

Our department website for the intranet website competition turns out well, despite my initial skepticism. If we ever win, I will give up my share of the prize as I did not really contributed much (and because my group came out top in the competition last year and the prize wasn't that fantasic).

I can't wait for school to start now.

2006-02-13T02:40:00.000+08:00

Okay, that might not be enough

Well, yeah.. I guess you must be sick and tired of my empty promises about blogging. Since I am in the mood, I shall write more.

Well, saw Peiwen on the train last Friday. Ya, its that coincidental. And Ya, I'm in my stupid office attire, reading ' A Shite History of Nearly Everything In the World' (lazy to check the title of the book, and if Tzemay you are reading this blog now, ya its that book). So freaking unpresentable.

Ding ding, impression marks plunged to rock bottom. I have no image at all. I am fat.

Somehow, if she's alone I would have approached her. This type of courage has evaded me since nearly two years ago.

(expecting ppl to comment 'What bullshit this bo ji guy is sprouting again', but I don't care)

I really would.

2006-02-13T02:23:00.000+08:00

I have to try

This will be a really short post which I promised every reader (ya, thanks for stopping by and not giving up on my blog). Recently, I'm really into playing game, so I neglected every other important things in life, and I also missed companionship from my friends - friends in real life. Hencefore, I resolve to put more in more effort for all the things that I cherished in life (eg chio bu, potention girlfriend, etc) after I reached level 60.

Anyway, total hongbao money <= $300. Only sufficient to buy motherboard.

):

Btw, Happy Friendship Day! and yeah, reluctantly wish all couples Happy V (I can't be bothered to find out the spelling) Day!

2006-01-05T18:10:00.000+08:00

New Year Resolution

2) Siphon more money from relatives to build myself a new computer.

2006-01-04T04:34:00.001+08:00

New Year Resolution

1) Not make any new year resolution as I don't keep to any anyway.

2005-12-26T20:46:00.000+08:00

It pays to fasten your seat belt

Was stopped by a police road block first time ever yesterday. Driver was Xianzhen. Passengers were Cherhao and I. Policeman 1 made an ambiguous action to wave us to stop. We didn't not read his action correctly. We slowed down and picked up speed up speed immediately after passing him. Policeman 2, who was standing behind him, was quite stun and made ferocious action for us to stop. Policeman 2 managed to catch our attention and we stopped. Policeman 2 started to admonish Xianzhen, our victim driver, for not knowing how to read traffic controlling signals and having to stop for a road block. Policeman 2 asked for our IDs, and bingo, he knew now I'm policeman 3. Started screening our IDs infront of xz (unprofessional police procedures). After ensuring that we are not traced, policeman 2 actually asked policeman 3 which department he is from. Thereafter, he released us.

Luckily, policeman 3 knew something like this would happen and did fasten his seat belt. Else there goes one-fifth of his month allowance.

2005-12-23T15:12:00.000+08:00

Nobody works on a Friday afternoon - How true!

Currently inside office stoning, and checking out forums. Mood is unexcitable. And just came back from Wainam's wedding buffet.

Regarding World of Warcraft

I got my mount already (shiok!), and we had our guild party on Wednesday. It was to celebrate our guild creation for one month and most of the guildies attended the party, armed with 500 snowballs (only me, I don't know the rest) and wore only the guild tabard. I won the 'Ugliest Pet' award and throughout the prize presentation we were damn rowdy. We threw snowballs at each other, breakdanced, aggroed mobs, randomly cheered and clapped and casted spells to enhance the ambience.

Thereafter, we processed to raid Stormwind, the alliance's trade town. Definitely, we didn't survive long as our guild has a lot of lowbies but the sight-seeing experience was fabulous. Stormwind looks more magnificent than Orgrimmar - our horde version of Stormwind - and it has nicer background music. The connectivities of alleys and zones are also much more complicated than Orgrimmar and it was quite hard to navigate around the town. They even have water tunnels just like those old English castles. Actually, I think we had better chances of chionging into the heart of Stormwind alive if not because we hesitated for too long. Long enough for all the players from the opposite faction to gather and skin us alive. So no choice, can only explore the town in ghost form.

When the raid ended, we gathered outside Orgrimmar to duel each other while waiting for all the guildies to congregate. Then we had our toast-up session in the Arena, for the success of the guild party and to future of our guild.

Will post some screenshot of my mount, Orgrimmar and Stormwind soon, real soon.

Regarding Carer and Caree game

I have a male for my Caree and I think I have a male for my Carer. My life is gay. I haven't gifted anything to my Caree. Shall do so next week.

My Carer is impressive. He had gifted me twice, once got my Unit wrong, and once got my name wrong. He oughted to be shot. But, but, maybe he's trying to make an impression on me. But mostly I won't be guessing incorrectly that he didn't do it on purpose.

Regarding Christmas

I'm still dateless. And will remain so even till end of xmas. Anyone wants to ask me out?

Regarding Aikido

I think I passed my grading, according to a congratulatory email from my instructor. 5th Kyu Aikidoka for the win!

Happy Holidays!

2005-12-17T16:18:00.000+08:00

(my mind is in a state of flurry right now)

I managed to quit band, albeit did so with some blatant lying. But I don't care, as least I can have my weekends to myself. Its really wondrous to be able to do anything I like, without having to abide by any f*cking rules, regulations and instructions, in these 2 short days which come sparingly every week.

Even though these 2 days are precious, I splurged my time playing WoW. Nice.
But cannot see Peiwen anymore, awwww.

Been sleeping late lately. Don't really like it because lack of sleep makes me emotional, temperamental and lose concentration. (translating my inner-demon into words: These side-effects generate a temporary yearning for me to look for a prey, erm, female friend)

To aggravate things, I sang ktv 12 - 6am last night. Was damn high even without alcohol. Sang every damn FIR song Xin Yue Tuan style. Sang every sad song Xie Yue Tuan style. That is loud and rowdy.

To worsen matters, went to play badminton from 11 -1pm. I'm feeling damn tired now.

Must stop living life like there's no tomorrow. I will stop staying up so late after getting my mount. I will perform well at work again.

2 more levels to Felsteed!

2005-12-07T11:36:00.000+08:00

Enthusiasm has burned out and incentives to perform for alumni band have diminished. Meaning I would rather spend time whacking monsters mindlessly and sleep during weekends. I hate to lie. I hate to tell band members right in their faces that I do not like them and I know the feeling is mutual. I skipped their urgent meeting last Sunday, and I hope for that, they will void my membership.

I'm beginning to like the next patch to WoW. Mana cost for summoning my mount is going to be reduced. 5.2 levels to Felsteed!

My work performance this week is exceptionally lousy. I can't get anything done decently. I don't use to blog during office hours.

I feel lousy generally.

2005-12-03T04:14:00.000+08:00

It feels good to be able to blog on my bed, made possible only because of my sister's laptop.

Today, technically yesterday, was last day of stay for our unit's intern, Baiting from RJC.

I'm lazy to modify any further the looks of my blog, so this will look like this for quite some while. Will have to make do.

Just some random ramblings before sleeping

2005-11-28T23:31:00.000+08:00

I do not know when I developed a liking for green.
So this blog will be green.
I will spend time in the near future, when I'm not playing World of Warcraft, to decode the template's code and then personalise it.
Feel free to interpret near.
I really wish that there's space to post my huge WoW screenshot in the text area, so that's something you all can look forward to.
Hope this customisation can be done before I reached level 40 whereby I will get my Warlock Mount.
I will then post my mount screenshot here.
7 damn levels more.
I reiterate, DAMN!

Yeah, I'm also a bo bo shooter.
Got 2nd class for my shooting recently.
Still can't identify why I can't aim even with laser.
The laser beam swerved so damn erratically around my target on that day that I swear it moved faster than any gasous molecule.
I wasn't even excited at all.
I just could not land any proper shot on the target.
Luckily I kill with a pen now, not a revolver.
I do not physically prowl the streets to protect your families.
I reiterate, DAMN!

And there's bonuses in joining alumni band.
The 'chio' juniors who I always look look during band pract last time also got join.
Erm, got chance to satisfy my paedophilic alter ego.
So happy

2005-11-12T02:09:00.000+08:00

I have received sincere comments that this blog is dull. Without pictures, without bitchings and without content. Thus I shall revamp this blog by enlarging the text space to accomodate pictures and I shall frequently update this blog with irrelevant ramblings. I can't promise a profanity-free content.

Hypothetically, all this will be realised before end of this month. Hypothetically, I am not lazy.

2005-11-08T23:29:00.000+08:00

Today is Tuesday - weekly server update day - which means that I don't get to play World of Warcraft tonight. I shall thus write something long to pass time.

Anyway, I went for alumni band practice last Saturday. Could not sight read with ease, could not pronouce my notes clearly and could not project my instrument's voice. Quite saddening considering that I had played my instrument for six years and had only stopped for two years.

Made me realised that I have been approaching music with the wrong attitude, total disrespect and incorrect learning methods. I see notes on the score as mathematical instructions and merely follow them, but do not see them as beautiful passages which await impatiently for me to thoroughoutly explore. I do not recognise how each note should sound. My tonal expression isn't prefect and yet I do not seek improvement - and I know how I can improve.

Guess it is time to restablish communication with my tuba - or whoever's tuba that I'm playing.

And just when I need this CD - Portrait of an Artist: Arnold Jacobs - it has gone missing. So infuriating because it is one of those I-shld-keep-properly-and-yet-I-left-it-lying-around-and-now-it-is-freaking-lost cd. Arnold Jacobs is one of the greatest authority with regards to tuba playing and breath control. I bought this cd long ago but never really listen to it attentively. Now that I need it for re-educational purposes it's freaking abducted by Martians.

Comtemplating whether to buy a new one or not.

His works and words contained inside the cd are priceless. But they indeed cost $25.

2005-11-02T19:25:00.000+08:00

I bought Jay Chow's newest album. ORIGINAL. NOT parallel import. Sounds poetic. Even comes with a poster. Ye Qu has this soothing and catchy tune to it.

End of temporary post. Will write real soon. I'm busy with World of Warcraft recently.

2005-10-11T01:29:00.000+08:00

I last met you nearly two year ago.

While I was struggling with my physics notes, you boarded the train. 'A' Level Physics would start in another 1 and a half hour's time. I wished I had finished studying all my notes, not just 43% of them. Not because I didn't want a C as my grade, but because I have endless things to say. To you.

I chose reading the notes, instead of talking to you. I oughted to be shot. I didn't get your phone number. I oughted to be shot twice.

I vowed to get your number next time I see you.

I saw you again yesterday, on 10 Oct 05. You were at Heeren. You wore a green top. You looked beautiful. I was wearing my fugly work attire, spotting unkempt hair and was going down the escalator. Unshaven. We looked at each other initially in doubt, but eventually recognised each other.

We exchanged smiles. Yours was sweet. Mine shld be highly sour. That's all. No phone number exchange again.

I did not rush upstair, where you are, to find you. I wasn't even rushing for time. I continued to walk on.

You were waiting for someone. I feared that that someone was your boyfriend. I continued to walk on.

I knew I would miss you. I continued to walk on.

(Someone pls just sneak up to me commando-style and break my neck to kill me)

(Just joking)

We may meet again 2 years later. I hope you're not someone's wife then.

I continued to walk on.

2005-09-26T16:37:00.000+08:00

I accidentally dug out some photos of mine last Saturday, photos which captured my looks 2 years ago. Probably around the time when I was sub-65 kg in weight. I was acutally thin. So what the hell did I do to gain 12 kg within these 2 years? F*ck me. I must exercise self-control. I will only consume 1 block of 53% fat cheese today.

Bloody scary. I shall try to fight my weight. I am 76 kg when I last weighed myself this afternoon.

2005-09-04T23:29:00.000+08:00

I had been playing too much of Maple Story lately, at the expense of my perfect eyesight. Experienced a whole day of blurred vision after playing intensively for around 5 hrs non-stop. Fortunately, my vision resumed its flawless functionality or else I'll be screwed. Short-sightedness would definitely warrant my parents a reason to ban me from using the computer.

Since I am talking about short-sightedness, I shall also talk about my current comtemplation - to get myself a pair of Oakley prescription spec. For nothing except for comestic value. For around $200.

I wonder whether its okay to leave open-ended post.

2005-08-28T10:28:00.000+08:00

Somewhen in my dream, I was holding your hand. It had been a long time since I last dreamt, inside my dreams.

Watching Bone Collector last night strengthened my belief that I really hold a keen interest in investigative works and forensics. More towards forensics. But I've not actually done anything to prove that claim. Never did any research, studies or even simple reading on it. *spoiler alert* The plot of the movie was essentially about a psychopath serial murderer minicking murders from the past and leaving clues behind for his actual prey - the detective - to decipher. All the murders of the innocents culminated in the psychopath leaving his last clue, explaining his motive and trying to commission his last crime.

The beginning of the movie was sleek. But became draggy nearing the end, just like my 884 page Shakespeare tome which I had stopped reading. The movie was gory too. Nevertheless I still felt that its a good 2hr 15 min wasted.

Lets talk about corny. I like the new Powershot advertisement that featured Maria Sharapova (her serves are funny looking). The ad is about her hitting every tennis ball so forcefully and POWERfully that the balls got stucked onto a school perimeter fencing-like fencing (this is not exactly the most apt description I know). Eventually all the balls formed the words 'Maria was here'.

The message was 'Make every shot a powershot'

Again my description sucks. See it for yourself.

Regards

2005-08-22T15:18:00.000+08:00

I dedicate this post to Benjamin, my colleague who continues to visit this blog conscientiously despite its inactivity. Yes your complaint works, and I succumb to it.

My current read:
William Shakespeare - The Great Comedies and Tragedies
A Midsummer's Night Dream

I bought this 884 page tome at a discounted price of $11.34. Must be that same impulse, which causes me to re-read To Kill a Mocking Bird (top of my E Lit text hate list), that drives me to spend money on something as incomprehensible as Shakespeare. Surprisingly, the book was not as intimidating as it was preceived to be. Can actually understand the story, and can mildly appreciate Shakespeare's word play.

Still got ard 20 more pages to go to move on to the next comedy, Much Ado About Nothing.

My current game:
Maple Story

Plain stupid, but addictive.

My current dissatisfaction:
Victor's Restaurant at Centre Stage, Marina Square

Roasted Chick with Herb = Boiled offerings sprinkled with green flakes of leaves
Crispy Softshell Crab = One lump of fried something

YES, Ke Ai Ji also nicer and the uncle provides better service. Only try their cream of Mushroom (soup) and tomato with cream sauce (one of the garnishes of my main course).

So Benjamin, you happy now?

2005-08-08T14:47:00.000+08:00

Exhilaration urges me to write something. Anything.

I'm beginning to receive $700 for my basic allowance. It does not matter now whether or not my promotion is ever going to be promulgated.

Didn't sleep well these few days. Because I chose not to. Been grinding to level up in Maple Story, meaning I have killed this same creature over and over for close to 1374 times to get closer to gaining another level. And with every leveling up, progressing to the next level will get exponentially worse. I wonder why am I torturing myself over this cuttie game. I'm masochistic.

My comp sucks. Can't even support the graphics of World of Warcraft. Makes me wonder whether I shld build a PC while still getting a Mac laptop at the time. I need the money to buy myself a DSLR too, damn it.

Will write more frequently, albeit my posts will shrink in details.

2005-07-23T16:51:00.000+08:00

This week is the 51th week of my NS, and most would have guessed, next week, 26th July, Wednesday, would mark the end of my first year in the Police force. And yes, the exploitation will continue for another year before I request for disruption to resume my academic pursues. During this year, I will not complain, like my peers do, that I have not learnt anything relevant to life later on. I am fortunate to be able to learn how to proficiently utilise MS Excel, edit websites, make birthday cards, produce online publications, design start-up screen, set up meetings and generate figures and reports. And I also know how easy it is to alter figures to anybody's advantage - you don't need an Accounting degree to know how - and how Manpower in an organisation works. During training, I also learn about back-stabbing (I'm not a practisioner), mob-mentality, leadership (I'm not really cut out to lead becos I'm as laid-back as anything), shooting and boot-licking (again, I'm not a practisioner, I only watch, be shallow and denouce CKS with the rest of the squad). I also have free time to pick up Aikido (yes, Aikido again!). Though life is fruitful now, I, regrettably speaking, still lack an intimate companion that has to be, preferably, a female.

Sorry. I took too long just to pronouce that I need a girlfriend, desperately. To compensate, I shall skip the part that would rapture my ego. Due to excessive expansion of course. I will write something about Alvin, Harry Potter, my trainee teacher sister, my room and whatever comes to my mind later later. Till then.

Regards

2005-07-18T00:37:00.000+08:00

I guess that updating this blog has turned into a weekly affair.

Firstly, I had gave my secondary 2 class chalet a miss because I knew that I would spend more money than I was supposed to, and I knew that I would be engaged in unnecessary socialising. Plus, I'm lazy to travel to Downtown East just to share my bed with another 10 over ppl, play daidee, watch tv, and breathe in dusty air. Maybe its the stay-in during police training that makes me loathe communal living, detest sharing personal space and hate putting up with other ppl's idiosyncracies.

I confess. I also want to save the money to get myself a new gi.

Anyway, the dric has done it again. Cedric has successfully f*cked me up with his appalling incompetence. If its any other day I could have forgiven his lousy arse and waited for him to rectify his mistakes in the figures he provided. But not now, not during this transitional period when soon ge has left for his new post and alvin will take another 2 months to acquaint himself with his jobscope. Not when my report is 5 days overdue. I'm screwed. If there is any miracle that can save me, it must be Cedric realising that he actually owns a pea-sized brain.

2005-07-08T23:23:00.000+08:00

For those who thought that I had died, sorry to disappoint you.

Today we went to East Coast for In-service. Things didn't go as well as expected initially, for our trip was delayed by around an hour as Wainam needed to clear some doc with DMP and DMP was 'too busy'. Then we had our lunch at Lagoon hawker and I ordered this laksa which tasted marvellous. After the laksa, also ordered chendol and the uncle was damn generous to throw in lotsa coconut milk, red beans and the green jelly thingy. So lunch was hearty.

After lunch, we wasted some time securing a more conducive pavillion for our unit's discussion session. Even so, we were disrupted once by a foul smell that came out of nowhere and another once by the grass-cutting car. The discussion was f*cking boring as it did not require NSFs' input and it did not really involved us. I'm involved more actively amongst the NS cos I was arrowed the secretary post. Also didn't know what to say when was asked for my opinion so had to echo some of the points discussed previously to make myself look smart. Lame. Was quite distracted when army ppl began to run along the jogging path as I tried to look out for LM.

Then we ended our day with rollerblading. Coincidentally saw LM at the blade rental shop. And wah, blading was so fun. I started noobishly as I had not skated since Sec 3 or so and I almost couldn't make my way out of the shop. Told Vin that I knew how to skate a bit before the In-service, so I was damn frightened when I can't even stand and balance myself at the shop. Luckily, managed to get back my tiny bit of touch and began to skate more smoothly after a while. If not, would be labelled as toa kang forever. However, I'm still afraid of kicking with my right leg. Maybe will buy a pair of blades to practise more.

Erm, then missed the timing and we could not make it back for aikido lesson. But managed to get my new thick judo-line gi. So exciting! But it only looks thick and in fact, its only thicker than my nua gi by a bit. So sad. Shall see whether it feels comfortable or not, to decide whether I'll buy another thick one and chuck my nua one aside forever.

Regards

2005-07-04T01:22:00.000+08:00

I wish I can relate deeper thoughts, give tuition to earn money, be more interesting and be wiser.

2005-06-26T02:01:00.000+08:00

Yesterday, went to Mount Vernon for my dojo's 2nd anniversary. Sounds familiar? Yeah it is the so-called gurkha camp! Where the gurkha contingent stays! So excited, but the guards at the main gate were probably the only gurkhas we (me, vincent, his gf and bendric) saw at Mt Vernon, excluding those we saw flying on the road on our way there (they ran too fast). Went there because my instructor lives there - as he is Head Ops, GC - and he decided to host the anniversary at his house.

Discovered that he speaks nepalese, was the winner of a senior manhunt and was the aide de camp of the late president Wee.

And as usual, I left myself out of any socialising and didn't interact much. Reason for my existence was only to finish the catered nepalese food. Perhaps, the highlight of the day was getting to watch 3 videos, 2 on gurkha trainings and 1 featuring an 8th Dan aikidoka. Quite intersting as he 'threw' ppl around without any physical contact. A 3rd dan present then at the anniversary celebration explained that the 8th dan guy managed to do so because he had very good understanding of 3 concepts - extension, space and a third one which I had guiltily forgotten.

Yes, I remembered the first 2 because I suck at them.

How? Think I'll buy a mat soon to practise and to meditate on.

Have a pre-course test on Monday and I haven't studied the course material. Hai, lazy to study. Hope won't fail.

Regards

2005-06-24T00:17:00.000+08:00

Few things had happened recently and now its time for debriefing. Erm, took my grading last Sunday at HQ and wow, it was the most relaxing exam I ever took. Get to talk, still get to remind my friend how to perform the techniques, get to laugh and most imptly, get to enjoy doing what I like on a Sunday morning when I was so damn fresh. But it was tiring.

And I passed.

I'm now 6th kyu. Graded. But I just went for class in Kembangan and I still moved like a noobish white belt. Aikido is probably the first and the last thing in this world that I feel so bad for sucking.

I also attended the Sgt course briefing. So know generally what the course is about. And yeah, I'm confirmed for the course.. so can promote if I don't stupidly fail the course hehe (:

Ah there's this irritating fly flying around me now. Spoilt my writting mood.

Ciao

2005-06-17T00:56:00.000+08:00

Don't boycott this blog, yet

Pls forgive me for my recent gibberish. I sank too deep into my darker side and stayed there for quite a while. As usual, I alienated everyone during this period. And I also tried too hard to mask my detestable behavior with claims that I'm endeavouring to get in touch with the spiritual planes. I apologise. Don't hate me anymore. I kinda walked out of my darker side liao..

Yesterday received two pieces of great news. First of all, I shld be going to Sergeant course and of course I would most likely be promoted. (Still need official notice from my superiors to confirm, sigh!) Shld be saving up the extra money that comes with the promotion so got pocket money during my studies and can buy a laptop and a camera. Wahaha can get a girlfriend too. Jacky you still single right? You're so eligible to apply for this post. But must confirm can go to the course and must pass it first.. Shall count the chickens later.

Secondly, I think I got affinity with the Padang. I got the tickets for this year's NDP and the last time i got tickets for the event was when it was held at the Padang. I shld not be going. I'm giving up my tickets to my mother. She hasn't been to the actual parade before and maybe she can spend her birthday there.

16 June was a fine day.

Regards

2005-06-15T15:47:00.000+08:00

For the past 6 months, I have been using the 15" fishbowl moniter at work. For the next 12 months, I will be using the 17" flat screen moniter at work.

Happiness.

2005-06-13T23:26:00.000+08:00

Indulgence is finishing a big packet of Ruffles without sharing.

A true person behaves the same way he acts outside as he is at home.

You know you are secular when your friends keep spending money with you, without gaining new experiences.

Think again

Regards

2005-06-11T02:33:00.000+08:00

I am not in good health recently, thus updating was delayed for around a week. It had been an exhausting, rewarding, depressing and hectic week and I was too occupied with generating my monthly report, handling my emotions, training in different dojos for quite a few days, bearing the pain of losing some of the SOs in my dept (including my current direct supervisor) and getting over my mistakes which had a 6-digit price tag. There's simply no extra time left to publicise my life, not like anyone really care about what I'm experiencing now.

Some flashbacks of the week -

1) Male period striked me first thing on Monday morning.
2) Ah soon (my direct superior) sent me an email about seeking help if I can't cope with my work. I guess I'm too sensitive and misread the mail as him doubting my abilities.
3) Chris talked to us, the SAs, about our strength and weaknesses. I lacked presentation to complete my packaging. Also must be more confident in speaking.
4) Realised how some mistakes in life can cost around 400k.
5) Trained in Bukit Ho Swee and Kembangan. Kembangan was conducive as there's cute girls practising there. Only fortunate enough to train with one of them then on Thursday. Bukit Ho Swee dojo was as small as 16 persons struggling to stay inside the area of a folded newspaper.
6) People Connexion was finally uploaded onto the intranet, what a pain in the arse.
7) I suck at Extention, the most impt component of aikido. I'm also not confident of moving in to complete techniques. Like what Bernie said, I like to stop half-way during the execution of the moves to take photographs.
8) Volunteered to help Zhiyuan pass his 'O' level English. Hope that I'm qualified enough (wahahah so lousy still wanna act pro), my syllabus can work and he can get good results. Indirectly, I will also benefit from teaching as I would need to improve even more. If he were to pass with flying colors, I will try to become a GP teacher (wahahahah dream on).
9) I will not eat Roti John and prata again before exercising.

That's all for now. I'll write a supplement to this post if I still can recall anything.

Regards

2005-06-05T22:59:00.000+08:00

I shld recycle my lottery ticket to lessen my sin,

I shld not ridicule the Indians again,

I shld stop boasting about insignificant small things,

I shld work harder so that the country will prosper,

I shld save a lot of money so I can donate to the poor,

but I wouldn't.

2005-06-04T03:03:00.000+08:00

I am due for my 6th Kyu grading on 19 June. My debit card finally arrived when there's only $23.90 left inside my bank account, and $17.50 of that belongs to the insurance company. I'm no longer known only as Tan to my instructor. He addressed me by my name a few times today. Things are working out in my life. Striking tml's 4D will complete my current life.

(This chunk of text had been cleared away as author finds it incoherently written, and he hopes that whoever had seen it can pretend that they had not.)

In the end, I still chose Arts Fac regardless.

Regards

** Editted on the 4th of June, 4.16pm

2005-06-02T19:55:00.000+08:00

I blew everything. I had spent every last bit of my week's allowance, and the very last dollar on 4D. And I was wearing half-u while buying. I am experiencing financial embarassment now. Why can't the Force just sack me?

Decided to be laconic. So that this blog can be an easier read. Its antagonising to read something boring and repetitive, and I acknowledge that.

Saw some male nurses during lunchtime. Makes me wonder whether its really all that bad about pursuing my interest in Arts fac. Some males still clear shit and change diapers when they are into their prime and they enjoy what they do. Must I really study something boring so that I can command a higher salary? I can't decide yet. I still have 3 more days.

Yeah, today was my first parade as a policeman. So today's parade kinda made up for my POP. (My POP was cancelled due to a rain.) And so happy, finally saw a minister right before my eyes though his speech was so boring and so read-directly-from-a-script-that-was-not-prepared-by-him. Also, everyone screwed up during recitation of the police pledge, all thanks to CP.

Nearly couldn't survive the standing still portion of the parade. Luckily there's a chio SO sitting in front of me, about 50 meters away. Kinda distracted me from the lactic acid forming at my soles. (I made it up. I don't know what that sensation is called.) Also a big thank you to the SO sitting beside her, who bared it all. Aiyo must cross your legs when sitting what.. you wearing skirt lah.

Ahhhh, didn't see Jasmine today, which is a good thing

(: - This always looks like a sad face to me. Check out Postsecret. I like the concept and I read about it long ago. Only got to check it out today.

Regards

2005-05-31T20:26:00.000+08:00

My new in-charge had been determined. After my current sir is posted out, an overseas scholar will take over. Bet he's going to generate lots more unnecessary working processes to better his chances at become the Commissioner of Police.

My vocation has just been upgraded from paperwork commando to paperwork diver.

2005-05-28T02:50:00.000+08:00

Omg, my tagboard actually censors vulgarities. 1*beep*2 stands for cockroach.

2005-05-28T01:30:00.000+08:00

I am growing up now

My day began at 4.14pm, when I made my way back to my workplace for aikido lesson. Learnt that parade rehearsal actually ends at 5pm today as today is some forcewide Family Day and everyone is made to go home at 5 to have dinner with their family. Wasted my leave, but rotting at home on a working day is priceless.

Was very distracted during lesson and was reprimanded several times for doing all the wrong moves and making all sorts of intolerable mistakes.

Then at the end of the class we mourned for a particular instructor, whom I am remotely connected with, as he hanged himself (okay, I don't know him and have never seen him before). I actually feel sad and I'm not those who usually do. Maybe its the somber atmosphere that amplified my emotion, but I truly believe that its something else.

Then, everyone began to discuss about him, about his greatness and started speculating his problems. As always, I would try to be philosophical and blabber on and on about how people shldn't only care about him after he died, about how he shldn't be so silly to commit suicide (I am a policeman and I ought to be skeptical) and shldn't be sad for his departure as it might be a relieve for him. Today, I am not doing so.

I just wish that I would not be called a bastard when I died.

Why do people only receive the most compliments when they passed on? What is the use of all the carings and praises after their death? How I wish now I can be a caucasian so I can give care and compliments as freely. Asians just feel uneasy after being praised.

Anyway, we shall not wait till death for another compliment. I am about to say some good things about my readers, and not in order of importance, we have

Calis - Thanks for caring for me in the hospital, though you are obliged to. Thanks for entertaining me when I'm bored and thanks for appreciating and tolerating my lousy jokes and bullying. Continue to be cheerful and try harder at acting cute.
Caiying - Thanks for advertising my blog for free and hence you are jovial, sweet and adorable. Hehe
Ah peh an ta (my father, eh he doesn't read my blog) - Thanks for slogging so hard to support the family and yet I'm not really as appreciative as I shld. Would try to talk to you more when you call back again.
Jackson - Thanks for always jioing me to play mahjong though I always reject your offer. Great friend, cheerful, loud but irritating. Overall still user-friendly haha
Huijing - Feel comfortable talking with you. Don't be lazy
Tzemay - Don't know whether you read my blog, but pls continue to be very tzemay. I like how you write. I suck at narration.
Benjamin - Don't be Bendric anymore. You can be zai one. Don't waste it.

If you are my secret fan, do inform me. You didn't come to my mind now, but you are as impt.

***

Okay, my aikido instructor is promoted to Supt of Police and therefore I guess he needs more men to be under him.

Supt Bernie: Oei Tan, you NS ah?
Ungraded white belt fumbled, but replied: ......... eh...... yeah.............. sir....... why???
Supt Bernie: Why you nv sign on!!!!
Supt Bernie continued: Civil service is good, see I work all the way for 27 years to become Supt. (Its not an easy feat. He didn't start off as a scholar or a senior officer) I thought I will nv be promoted.

I gathered that I look like a gurkha and he happened to be the Head Ops in Gurkha Contingent hencefore I was the only person being accosted with this signing on question. Originally I really thought of signing on. But I'm not as pro as Bernie to have become a commando major, to have gone thru the ranger course, to have lots of military colors and to be able to run 16km under 2 hours with a very very heavy bag when he is already 48 year old.

So I can only carry balls. But for 20 over years of my life? I guess I'll give the signing on thought a skip.

Regards,
Jun Jie

2005-05-26T14:05:00.000+08:00

I wrote something yesterday

I did write something yesterday during office hours. Perhaps that was why I was punished for not working and wasting tax payers' money. Dear Bloggers, still remember how you didn't manage to save your thousand word post? That happened to me. Just when I was about to save the entry then the internet connection went hay-wire. I lost a brilliant post and lotsa time. Nah, just kidding about the brilliant post part.

Okay, I am granted 2 hour time-off later and am allowed to take leave tml. If I continue to keep mum I shld be able to skip tml's parade rehearsal. The rest is very necessary as I just completed a major, but dumb, computation request and I'm totally exhausted. (Actually its because I only sleep after 1 at night for these few days, but I still maintain that the fatigue is brought about by the process of completing my work.)

Eh, now is lunchtime and I brought BK back to office for lunch. Damn I'm tempted to buy some Durian Connoisseur's durian puff from the canteen. AHHHH Goodwood Park's Durian Connoisseur!!! Okay I have nv tried the puff before but my colleague says its nice. I shld not have exclaimed that much.

And today is a moodless day. Pissed by my colleagues right at the start of the day. And it doesn't stop there. This constitutes another reason for taking time-off later.

(I shall copy all this into a text file before saving)

And I have to fork out money to buy my own dinner. Sigh, I'm so broke. I'll only order ice water for the class outing.

Regards,
Jun Jie

2005-05-24T21:16:00.000+08:00

English Springer Spaniel

2005-05-21T18:21:00.000+08:00

Lurking Cockroach and leaking entrails

Last night, I managed to kill the cockroach which had been lurking around my table for months and I must have beaten the shit out of it. Had at least tried to squash it for thirteen times under the Starhub brochure before it emerged, crawling away and dying. As it crawled around, it left behind a trail of kidney, intestine and what I perceived to be, a variety of other organs.

Obviously, happiness could not be derived from something which had just dirtied my table. But the pungent smell from its entrails does make me believe that cockroaches can survive on anything, including plastic and toxin. Anyway, the unfortunate cockroach was the only casualty in Ops Kill the Damn Cockroach and Celebrate. It had been sent down the rubbish chute. Shld be cremated by now.

This entry is as unpleasant and educational as how I plotted it to be. It would not be appropriate to dedicate it to anyone.

Welcome to the 10th entry milestone of this blog.

Regards,
Jun Jie

2005-05-21T00:39:00.000+08:00

Doggie Lover is me

Her name is Jasmine. Can't find the species of the dog that she's walking. Maybe my attention was only on her and not the dog.

Anyway, if you do read my blog pls email me at goreng.pi@gmail.com. I would like to dedicate my 10th entry to you. Perhaps.

Regards,
Jun Jie

2005-05-16T22:29:00.000+08:00

Playing with a biased die

This is my first entry with a title. I figured out that an entry with an appropriate title will sell. I think I must find an intriguing hobby soon so I can feature it here.

This entry was actually dedicated to describe how I am being screwed by the system, again. I changed my mind because the newly-imposed and disappointing promotion to sergeant criteria is not worth being mentioned again. Shameless methods to cut cost seriously made my day rotten. Yes, someone less capable than me is getting promoted while I will still remain as a corporal. Don't ask me how.

A trainee addressed me as Sir while I was on my way to the toilet to change to my uniform. Guess my predicament isn't that bad afterall. It's only a loss of $3600.

I gather that I will not have a girlfriend for the coming one to two years. Still thought I can take care of another person with my extra allowance. Anyway saw this cute girl from the k9 unit (eh, not a bitch) during parade rehearsal. Nice incentive to attend the parade. I look forward to the next practice.

Regards,
Jun Jie

2005-05-15T01:29:00.000+08:00

Work does not get worse until you're hampered by the lack of equipment. Now I lack Acrobat to finish my department's online publication and I do not feel like ripping off the program from the net myself. So, would need to consult my morals again tomorrow.

Nothing much happened since Wednesday. Didn't take leave for Monday so that would mean I will be attending the Police Day Parade vetting, in full-uniform and under the scorching noon sun. Managed to shake off my lackadaisical attitude on Thursday and do not feel as lousy since then. My father came back from Korea too but I haven't really got the chance to interact with him. Will try to keep him company tml. Anyway, Aikido class on Friday was satisfying, as I'm getting more comfortable with backrolls and becoming less tense while doing all the moves. My elbow was hurt unknowingly during class and I caused Vincent's shoulder injury.

I think I'm shallow. Think I must spend less time online trying to get people to talk to me and utilise the time instead to learn more stuff. A new language? A discipline like philosophy or psychology? The latter maybe.

'When you dodged you will not be cut, when you want to protect someone she will not die, and when I attack, I'll cut.' -- quoted from Bleach, an anime which I'm currently following. Can't imagine that I would need a cartoon to teach me resolution. I am really weak-willed.

About 68 percent sure about going to NUS. Formulated this very stupid idea about majoring in English and minoring in Japanese, French and German. Might not work afterall as I can't even manage English at all. I still maintain that my result is fluke.

I'm too tired. I need a holiday.

Regards,
Jun Jie

2005-05-11T21:41:00.000+08:00

I'm beginning to deliberate my writings, the omen of this blog running its course. I do not like how I'm blatantly trying to litter my blog with hyperbole, cooking up a style which does not suit me and writing exaggeratedly to impress. I shld not be inflated by my audience of 3 persons and shld continue writing like I did in the first entry.

I'll revert back to writing diary - despite its commonness - so that this blog can be kept alive. But I'll definitely change the layout of this site as I realised that there are at least a few thousand users who are using the same template as I am. Maybe on Saturday.

My weight is fluctuating between 73kg and 75kg currently and I feel sluggish. My mental fatigue is at its new high and I feel lousy at work because I can't perform reasonably well. Can't believe that I'm wasting time playing pokemon at work. I will go gym - not the pokemon ones - to work out tomorrow and hope that I can be cured.

I'm taking out the comments leaving portion of the blog soon. It's embarassing to not rouse any comment everytime.

I will write again once I get out of my lousy spell.

Regards,
Junjie

2005-05-10T21:11:00.000+08:00

Blogs that got noticed usually have a theme. Therefore, my blog would probably never get noticed afterall, unless I'm really resolved to turn this into a porn site. Otherwise I can talk in third person as Darth Vadar but that would really make me sound stupid because I'm not a Star Wars saga addict. Oh, this idea is not original anymore, damn!

Anyway if you are that someone who have waited for me to write something new, I seek your forgiveness for my absence these few days (1.. 2.. eh yeah 2 days) as I was preoccupied with sleeping, serving my manhood obligations and fighting bed bugs. My sir ah soon's computer had just crashed so I shld get lesser work these few days and will be able to blog more, during office hours that is.

My current wallpaper - looks nice in 1024 * 768

I don't really know how to continue from here. I guess that I am writing this post to entertain anyone who bothered to check out my blog and to inform everyone that I had just found an image hosting site and will thus be posting nice pictures every now and then. Maybe I shld start working on a theme too (don't hope that much though). Ciao

Regards,
Junjie

2005-05-08T07:06:00.000+08:00

A general recap of what had happened for the past 2 days.

On Friday

Work is so important in my life that it is worth mentioning even though nothing really exciting happened. Work really sucks.

And I never intend to reveal this following piece of information to anyone until I have earned my hakama but circumstances forbid. Okay, I admit that I'm attending aikido classes and am loving it, except when S(tink)-San becomes my uke. He earns the title with this distinctively obnoxious odour on his gi and apparently it's really a good distraction to whoever's partnering him. Seriously thinking that S-San is using this tactic to cause great discomfort and pain to us (white belts of the aikido class), on top of the physical ones which he causes when he bends our arms awkwardly and clumsily, so he can out-perform us. Sometimes, I really can't help but have to pretend to be subdued by his techniques so I won't need to suffer unneccesary physical trauma. Don't have the heart and seniority to tell him off. Sigh.. Aa kong weir and the self-proclaimed brown-belt but buay gan ah nei also haven't been coming for classes. Kinda miss aa kong weir even though he talks more than he moves.

Went jalan jalan after class with Vincent. Ate Korean hotplate and feel that my father has been suffering for the past 2 years while working overseas mostly in Korea. Except being hot, Korean cuisine is mostly tasteless.

I miss him and he's coming back soon. Will spend the next few days pushing myself and my sister to pack the house so he can return to a tidy home. Today is mother's day and my mom will be spending her night with her church and cell group members. Actually wanted to give her a dinner treat - my sister will foot the bill first as the prodigal brother has used up his pay - but have to call it off.

Sorry, I have digressed.

The next few hours happened in a flash. Went home. Shower. Chat online. Received great news. I was accepted into NUS according to the Online Application Status. Exhilerated for a moment. In dilemma the next. Do not know whether to choose NTU or NUS. Headache. Scare of pimple outbreak. Sleep.

On Saturday

Went out with lanmao and cherhao. Went to Kino and found out that the place is damn hugh. Erm, yes pls pardon me for being so ignorant for I'm always stuck at either the comics corner or the sports corner whenever I visit Kino. Other book genres just don't intrigue me. The day was largely lame as we roamed around aimlessly until we went to play pool (so witty). *Don't ask me why, I just feel like praising myself for no reason* Erm, I'm tired now and I guess whoever is reading this must have been bored to death so I'm concluding prematurely. Ciao

Regards,
Junjie

2005-05-05T23:10:00.000+08:00

Hi all,

There are a few things that I have to do this week. Firstly I would need to clean my room. Utmost importance as I found a cockroach resting on my study table in the morning. Secondly I would need to hound my sister to pack her part of the room. Thirdly finish all my unread newspapers, TIME and NG. Fourthly study some difficult words so I can use them in this blog. Must try to write in good English sometimes too.

Today is hectic. Can't finish my work and would need to extend my work week to Saturday. Ought to earn 5k. Luckily I received the chalet voucher for being the Star Staff in March, else I won't be able to tolerate workload of 3 persons.

Decided to restrict access to this blog. Shldn't be spreading words anymore about its existence. So I can curse more thoughtlessly and whine more blatantly. Will inform close friends still. Ciao

Regards,
Jun Jie

2005-05-04T20:54:00.000+08:00

Alright, as promised.

There won't be a next entry that will feature the girl whom I feel something for. Now she only meant to me as another person with a new boyfriend, a mistake, my excuse for feeling sore and the reason why I'm a loser. At least I haven't been toyed around with, what an ethical player she is.

Erm, she shld be out of my life by now. Period.

Anyway, the In-service was cancelled, and so was the cycling trip at East Coast. And yes, I did carry at least a ton of clothings with me to work. Am lethargic throughout the day as I didn't sleep well last night. Think the alloy fixation in my left wrist had become ferrous too and attracted infinite amount of work for me. Today is a sad day. Shldn't depress myself any further. Ciao.

Regards,
Jun Jie

2005-05-04T04:06:00.000+08:00

Hi all,

This is the 193848374039481th time I initiated a blog, and I have decided to adopt an informal tone for it. No bombastic words, no carefully-crafted paragraphs, no insincerities and no jokes. Chances of survival for this blog, like the previous ones, are bleak but nevertheless I'll still try to maintain writing. Template of this blog sucks, but i'll still continue writing every now and then - I'll personalise this blog someday. I have no creative juices and am damn boring but I'll improve. Anyway, end of the banter which I tried consciously to craft again because personally, I'm not amused by it myself.

Okay, I am now writting in the dark with an orchestra of birds chirping non-stop outside my house at around 4am. Woke up abruptly at 3 to play diablo 2 and managed to level up before being killed mercilessly by minions of destruction. This is a reflection of real-life. I'm getting whipped by minions of infatuation and am dying from it soon.

It might be just wishful thinking on my part but this is the first time in this many years that my emotions are finally stirred. Was acting high on testoterone for the whole morning (am referring to yesterday morning) which was totally unnecessary. I'm a loser, as I'm not even brave enough to ask for her number.

Details of this episode will be found in my next entry.

I'm tired now. I don't want to lose my sleep over a girl whom I barely know. Hope my blogging inspirations will not run dry that soon. Hope I will have avid fans, hope I'll get over her in another week and hope I can wake up for work tml. Yeah work is cycling for half-day tml. This is so surreal and un-NSish. Ciao

Regards,
Tan Jun Jie
SA MPU
Manpower Dept (haha this lousy signature is the exact one which I use in office)